Re-entry: Six Months in.

Believe it or not it has been six months since the Braykos re-entered Green Bay, Wisconsin from Hong Kong.  Honestly, time has flown.  It's strange returning to a place; you have changed and the place and people have changed. . . and yet, there are those things that haven't changed, too.  And that is what I find myself appreciating the most.

First, the sky, the clouds, the birds, the sunrises and sunsets.  These are somehow just as beautiful as they ever were but at the same time more so.  The sky seems bluer.  The clouds sometimes puffier or more perfectly "The Simpsons" in their drift.  The birds and the squirrels are a joy to feed and watch at the bird feeder.  I find myself having fun because they seem to be so happy themselves.  The sunrises and sunsets have been as glorious as any you would find in Cancun.

I have also enjoyed the change of seasons.  I haven't experienced a true autumn for more than seven years.  But even in Korea, the autumn wasn't very beautiful.  The autumn in Wisconsin can be stunning.  And it was.  I got outside every chance I could and took hundreds of photos! The color contrasts with the chill in the air. . . perfection. 

And then there are the seasonal things.  Halloween in the neighborhood here was especially enjoyable because we have two neighbors who go full-on "spooky yard"- RIP signs, corpses rising from the ground, fences with danger signs, creepy dolls positioned in ring-around-the-rosy.  You may not realize this, but Halloween is not a holiday celebrated in Korea.  So our tiny ex-pat community created something fun for the kids, but only our families and our kids participated.  Thus, having neighborhood after neighborhood with decorations and carved pumpkins out for weeks was quite the "treat".  

The same could be said for Christmas decorations now.  In Hong Kong the school decorated quite beautifully, as did the businesses in the city.  And friends would decorate their apartments too, with trees and decorations and all.  But again, seeing our own neighborhood decorated - outside lights and yard Santas and reindeer, and now a bit of snow, too, just makes me appreciate the beauty of the season in a new way.

Finally, Brent and I have been very much enjoying the Packer craze that permeates Green Bay, especially on game days.  We are taking advantage of our near proximity to the stadium by parking cars in our driveway and on our lawn.  We love the friendly "Go Pack Go!" exchanges with total strangers walking by in their warm Packer gear.  We love making chili and having a beer and watching the game from beginning to end in REAL TIME.  We love walking around the stadium itself the day before when thousands of visitors descend upon Green Bay in preparation for the big game.  We love hearing the local bands playing at bars just blocks away. We love the excitement in the air and the occasional free tickets!  I put on my green and gold coat, scarf, even slippers!  It's awesome and even better when shared with family; I happily attended the Washington v Packers game with my dad.

Each city has its own flavor.  Six months in and I am very much enjoying this place at this time.  I appreciate spending time with old friends, making new ones, and exploring Green Bay again to see what treasures arise.  Life is good and it feels like home.

Re-entry "How to talk to an Ex-pat"

I have now experienced several months of repatriation, and I can say with certainty that very few people seem to care about what the last 11 years of my life were like living in Asia.  That is not meant to be an insult or complaint as much as it may seem.  It is an observation.

And so I have been thinking about it quite a bit.  WHY?  Why is it that I can have conversations with old friends and the topic of life in Hong Kong never comes up?  Or if it does it goes something like "Is it good to be back in Wisconsin?"  Such a question seems to cut off any talk of life in Asia all together.  

I have spent some time over the years reflecting on this phenomenon as similar experiences happened each summer when we would visit.  I believe there is a gap.  And I believe the gap has to do with curiosity and connection.  Brené Brown writes about curiosity and how humans find it very difficult to be curious about things they know nothing about.  I have recognized this in myself.  For example, when my sister had cancer some years ago, I simply didn't know what to ask or how to ask it.  And so I would steer the conversations in another direction.  While I did know how to be sympathetic and loving, I didn't know how to be curious.  But others who had already experienced cancer or who had prior experiences with friends seemed to know what to say or ask or talk about.  In my present situation, this often means that only people who have traveled or lived abroad or who have watched documentaries or movies about Asia are apt to engage in any discussion about my life in Asia.

Check out my newest writing endeavor!

How do you gracefully navigate that final year of high school with your teenager? Here I will share my tips with you.

Adulting 101: Parent Cheat Sheets

Spaciousness

Spaciousness.  The roads feel wide!  The parking spaces have so much lee-way.  (It is a luxury to not always have to SQUEEZE out of my car because the door is only 1/2 way open.)  There are fields and fields that go on and on for acres as you drive through rural Wisconsin. Even in my own space I have both a front and a back yard to enjoy.  The flatness of Green Bay also lends itself to the feeling of spaciousness as the horizon seems to go on forever.

I actually didn't feel cramped in Hong Kong.  I got used to bustling streets with lots of people when we were in downtown HK.  And nature was plentiful on the Southside where we lived.  Yet, due to the mountains and the water, the buildings, and the closeness of it all, I never felt spaciousness.  Grandeur, yes.  Spaciousness, no.

Home entries and rooms are generally much larger than I have become accustomed to.  You know, those entries with a high ceiling and a spot to check yourself in the mirror before leaving?  That is new to me again.  It feels luxurious and somehow off to have all that space.

I notice even at grocery stores there is so much room in the aisle!  And the grocery carts are generally far larger in the US, too.  (Perhaps that leads to buying more groceries or goods?)  The grocery store near us was more the size and feel of an old general store or a little convenience store on the edge of a small town.  The aisles were close together and the shelves packed with a few of everything but not much of anything.  Not so here!  So much of everything and so much room to display it all.  Even two months living in Green Bay now, the grocery aisles seem huge and foreign to me.

In Washington DC we visited the monuments at the National Mall.  Now there is space!  So much space provided for each monument.  Even the national mall itself has held millions of people; it is that large.  And although it is a tourist attraction, there are far fewer people milling about than on a normal day in downtown Hong Kong.  This too makes spaces feel. . . well, spacious.

I suppose what I am saying is that I had become accustomed to spaces being smaller and closer and squished.  Neither is right or wrong, but it certainly is. . . different.  And something I've noticed upon re-entry. 

Wide lanes, wide roads, big sky, and spacious distance between Arlington National Cemetery and the Lincoln Memorial. Brent on the bridge as we walked across the Potomac River. 

"The Hill"

I remember being always amazed at the beauty and challenge of the mountains in Hong Kong and Korea. Now, experiencing Wisconsin's topography again with new eyes has been delightful. 

"The Hill".  Alec and I were at UW-Eau Claire for his first college visit.  There they boast "The Hill".  (How flat is this place?) We heard all about it during the orientation and then our tour guide made a big deal about it before we were to leave on the tour.  There are two ways to get from the lower campus to the upper campus, the STAIRS or the road on THE HILL.  

As a slow sprinkling rain began, our Eau Claire Senior, Jason, first took us to The Stairs.  "Let's take the stairs," he said.  "Don't worry, we will take it slow.  And don't worry, if you are a student and don't like the stairs, there is an on-going free shuttle to get you from the lower campus to the upper campus." (How big is this thing anyway?)

These were wooden stairs winding their way through the beautiful lush, green Wisconsin underbrush and woodlands.  Through the trees we couldn't see very far up the hill with clarity.  But it looked inviting, even challenging.  Our group of 10 began the climb.  At about 6 stories there was a landing where we all rested and caught our breath before the rest of the climb.  "Have a seat and some water if you like," said Jason.  Alec and I looked at each other, "That wasn't too bad.  But how much is left now?" we wondered.  

Well, as we left the covered landing we could now see to the top of the hill.  About 4 more stories and we had reached the top of The Hill.  At the crest, we chuckled to ourselves thinking of the HKIS campus and the many many stairs to be climbed each day especially from the field to the entrance of the high school for Alec as a middle schooler.  

By the time our tour of the upper campus was done, the sprinkling rain had become torrential. Now we needed to decide whether to take the steps or the road down "The Hill".  My vote was for the road as I worried the wooden steps had become slippery.  Plus, I really wanted to see what this famous hill was like!  We opened our umbrellas to begin the descent in the heavy rain. Our tour guide led us down a slow winding road without a visible end.  Again, Alec and I chuckled as we reached the bottom in about 4 minutes after having carefully selected our footing in the rain.  This wasn't even a 1/4 of the length of Villa Rosa, the hill just beyond the HKIS gates.  

Forty-year old Brenda would have huffed and puffed and cursed "The Hill".  But this Brenda was simply chuckling and realizing anew how flat so much of Wisconsin actually is. 

Re-entry: New to me

We have been busy re-patriating to the USA and to Green Bay for a week now.  Re-entry is much like departure - there is the flurry of visits and hugs with people, only now these are hellos instead of goodbyes.  (Still tears and a heart full and aching, though.)  There is the handling of everything that you own, piece by piece, only now there is the decision of where each thing goes in the house.  

Unique to repatriation, though, are the cultural differences one encounters while engaging in the community.  I've taken a few notes on things that are new to me (or maybe just feel new to me after eleven years away). And so I would like to begin a new short series called "Re-entry" documenting my journey returning to life in the US, Wisconsin, and Green Bay. 

New to Me

Masks After leaving the airports, the first very noticeable change is not seeing masks on everyone.  Hong Kong is still quite strict about wearing masks in public (in part because few have been vaccinated).  But here there are very few people wearing masks indoors or outdoors.  This takes a bit of mental adjustment.

Airport Cart We have travelled a lot over the years, and not until hitting O'Hare did we need to pay for a cart to move our luggage.  What is normally a free service suddenly became $7 a cart!  What?

Friendliness at O'Hare I do believe that the decimation of the airline industry has resulted in better service at O'Hare.  As a family for many years we have noted how rude workers at O'Hare have been in comparison to other airports.  Over the past few years that has been changing.  And this time there was a stark - and pleasing difference!  Our airport shuttle driver was literally singing and providing a brief tour on our way to the car rental, for example.  Also, another shuttle driver noticed I was about to pay for a cart and pointed out there was a loose one available.  A small kindness goes a long way.

Sugar and fat Eating out suddenly became more challenging.  Menus seem to have limited fresh items and far more sugary and fatty items.  Not to mention the portions and sheer amount of food served with a meal seem to be much bigger. 

Cup sizes As we were cleaning out our kitchen we found a plastic sippy cup designed to hold - 20+ ounces of coffee in a car.  The base would fit in the cupholder of a car, but the rest of the cup is massive.  It is mind-blowing how big some of these cups are!  At restaurants Alec has complained that there is no "medium".  He said the small is small but the medium is large.  He just wants a medium (think 12 oz versus 18 oz).  

Recycling Where are the recycling bins in the community?  It doesn't make sense to me to go to a vegan "smoothie in a bowl" sort of place literally called "Dirt" only to be served in plastic with plastic utensils and then have no recycling option.  What is up with that?  

Gas I know everyone is complaining about the rise is gas prices, but to us $2.89 is a good deal.  In HK we would be paying $9.40/gallon right now. Feeling blessed to be here!

Groceries HK is one of the most expensive economies in the world.  And so it was a pleasant shock to do our huge grocery run to stock the kitchen and come away paying only $309.  I have to tell you, I am pretty good at guessing the cost of groceries and I literally predicted a $600 bill.  Woohoo!

Sunset I have very much loved our view of Tai Tam Bay and the occasional lovely sunrises.  Now I am thrilled to see the beautiful sunsets. 

More to come. . . 

Thank you, Asia "Wishlist" (1 more day until seeing Adam)

"Wishlist"
 

10:05 PM in Hong Kong

Airport Terminal 1. Gate 26.

2 hours until the plane takes off.

We are waiting now.  These are the final moments of being a Hong Konger.  

Yesterday was full of goodbyes and emptying an apartment and getting to a hotel.  

It was an emotional roller coaster.  

Today was calm.  

Time for a Messenger chat with Adam. 

Time for a nice breakfast.  

Time for tea.  

Time for a perfect message at Luxe in Wan Chai.  

Time for Starbucks and cream puffs.  

Time for floating in the pool at the appointed slot.  

Time for room service with the family.  

Time for a tiny nap before leaving Ocean Park Marriott at 8:30 pm. 

The city lights were clear and beautiful as we passed by for our final time as residents.

I wish I could have seen Siem Riep in Cambodia.  

I wish I could have gotten to Taipei, Taiwan and Jeju, Korea and Tokyo, Japan.

I wish I could have visited Seoul and Boracay one more time.

I wish I would have seen Victoria Harbor from Ozone (on the 101st floor?) one more time

And walked through the Old Walled City park.  

I wish I could have given our helper a goodbye hug, but our paths didn't cross in person yesterday to do that.

I wish I could have eaten with my HKIS cohort (7 years!) at a local spot once more.

I wish I could have gathered the Super Moms together once more.

I imagine I shall think of many more things I would have liked to do or do again, 

but that is the nature of endings - 

there will always be some things left unfinished.

Therefore, let me instead now blow my wishlist to the wind and let it go.  

As Brent so eloquently reminded us all at Baccalaureate, "It is well. It is well with my soul."

Thank you, Asia "A Blessing for HKIS" (2 days until seeing Adam)

It has been a wonderful and emotional and long, exhausting, last day at HKIS.  I am so grateful for the kind words, well wishes, hugs, and gifts from my wonderful colleagues.  Goodbye to all!

I would like to leave you with this blessing:

May the light of God surround you.

My the love of God enfold you.

May the power of God protect you.

May the presence of God watch over you.

May you always know that wherever you are, God is.

Here is an image from yesterday's graduation pre-ceremony social.  Our 7-year cohort of Brenda, Heatherly, Hamlet, Simon, and Brent.  

Thank you, Asia "Forever Changed: 2021" (3 days until seeing Adam)

This is part 2 of a 2 -part reflection on changes. 

Our eleventh - and potentially final year - living abroad is coming to a close in a few days and we shall travel back to Green Bay to repatriate.  I'm excited to get back home.  I have been wrestling with the big question, "How has this experience changed me?"  I understand few will have the time or interest to really ask me that question.  (It is a hard one to ask and even harder to listen as they slog through their thoughts.)  So let me curate those thoughts here.  

Read on if you care to know more. 

I would say a big change is that my world view has changed.  I feel rather untethered from the US.  Political campaigns, mask madness, daily mass shootings, Covid numbers rising and falling, Black Lives Matter - all of these major events consuming so much attention and energy for my friends and family have not been my reality.  My heart is saddened by all the drama and trauma.  But at the same time, They were happening "over there."   My world for several years was more about realizing Kim Jong Un was far more bark than bite.  Then my world for several more years was more connected to HK Protests, mask mandates, and - most recently - National Security Law repercussions.  In 2020 when North Korea blew up the liaison office in the DMZ, I thought, "Wow.  I've stood in that building!" In my world when India shuts down due to ridiculously high Covid-19 deaths, my heart aches for a country I have volunteered and love dearly.  When war reignites between Israel and Palestine, I text a friend there to see how she is affected and speak to a student I know whose is Israeli.  In some way I have become a citizen of the world. 

After adjusting to apartment life, I have found I don't need nearly as much square footage as before.  Being in large homes even feels a bit overwhelming and unnecessary.  I now have a hard time even imagining all the things we used to store in our basement.  What were we keeping all that stuff for?  We have a shipment of "stuff" on its way over the ocean right now.  As much as I can't wait to reunite with my gong, I have a feeling I have kept too much stuff.  I have certainly appreciated the easy access to nature in both Seoul and Hong Kong.  Perhaps apartment living encouraged us to get outside more.  As we didn't have a back yard, we did find ourselves hiking or biking or heading to the beach.  That was 

pretty cool.  But now I absolutely look forward to sitting in my own back yard again!  And I can't wait to invite friends and family over for a back yard BBQ.

I have blogged a few times about public transportation, so I won't go into much detail here.  But, it has been amazing!  To have the choice of driving or taking cheap public transportation just makes so much sense.  Additionally, I can now drive on either side of the road.   

In some ways, living and travelling in countries in which English is not the primary language spoken has changed me.  I tune out strangers' voices.  I recognize a wide variety of languages.  I can read Hangul (but I don't know what it says.) I understand what it is to be illiterate.   I understand that a culture is held in its language; if you don't know the language, you won't really know the culture. I marvel at children and adults who speak several languages.  I am far more at ease speaking to someone from a different country than I used to be, too.

When we left Green Bay my hobbies had been primarily walking, acting, and singing.  Since then I have re-engaged in old interests and gained some new.  I have again played volleyball, swam regularly, and played piano (all activities from my youth).  I read a ton and wrote lots of poems, also interests since childhood that I hadn't had much time for.  But I also began blogging, took up hiking, weight-lifted, did circuits, a bit of yoga and learned how to play a gong! I started meditating and learned a bit of qigong. And, believe it or not, I did a deep dive into quantum physics and the nature of consciousness. While in Korea, I volunteered as an English teacher to North Korean Women Refugees and loved it.  I have also enjoyed many other volunteer service opportunities.  

And yes, my job spoiled me.  I loved having smaller classes and fewer classes than when teaching in Green Bay.  I loved the amazing students and ease of classroom management.  I loved the time I had as an educator for creativity and collaboration.  I loved taking students abroad for Speech and Debate tournaments and Drama. I appreciated all of the professional development opportunities. Most of all, I loved the better work-life balance that I have had (minus the Covid months).

And since my decade in Asia has coincided with a shift from first half of life to second half of life, I have to say my sense of Self has shifted.  I know who I am on a completely different level now.  I am far more attuned to my heart that I used to be.  I see through a lens of connection, not separation.  Of love not fear and trust in where life leads. Perhaps one could say, I have peace in my Soul for these years have served as a sort of refinement of who I am.  And for that, I am most grateful. 

Thank you, Asia "Forever Changed: 2011" (4 days until seeing Adam)

This is Part 1 of two parts.  I am reposting a post from May 22, 2011 called "Forever Changed."  At the time, it had a whopping 3 views!  Part 2 will be posted tomorrow, when I again reflect on how I have changed.  Enjoy.

Our first year living abroad is coming to a close in a few weeks and we shall travel back to Wisconsin  to visit friends and family.  I'm excited to get back "home."  I expect some people may be interested in how this year has changed me.  And while I've given thought to what I've enjoyed this year, what has been challenging, and what I've missed from back home, I haven't yet given much thought to how I've changed.

So let me try it here.

I would have to say the biggest change is that I've been untethered from the USA and North America.  We used to think, "Let's go to Utah (or Florida, or California, or Mexico)" now we think "Let's go to Malaysia (or the Philippines or Australia or Cambodia or Vietnam or Europe or on safari in Africa)."  Our children used to think "Let's go to the Dells."  Now Anna says things like "When can we go to Paris, the city of Love?"  This is pretty huge because it implies a different world view than before (for all of us).  Globalization already had been making the world smaller (or flatter, depending on who you read), but now globalization is also a part of my existence and very real.

Changing from living in a house to living in an apartment has been less significant that I thought it would be.  Some friends and I were musing about this today.  We worried that living in a big city would mean the end of nature in our lives.  We used to sit on the deck in the back yard and enjoy the flowers and trees, etc.  We worried that apartment life would feel so confining without a back yard to go to.  What we've found is that Korea (at least Seoul and the surrounding communities) has made a concerted effort to create green spaces (extensive parks and biking trails) for people to enjoy.  Also, the mountains are replete with trails.  It is not hard to find nature here at all, and that makes apartment living less sterile and confining than one might think.  So, while I yearn for a back yard BBQ and the chance to sit on a lawn chair, I've also come to love hiking and biking on trails and playing with friends and family in a local green space.

In some ways, using public transportation has changed me.  First of all, I'd never used the city buses in Green Bay (and I don't know that I would now).  But now I feel more comfortable taking a bus or a subway or a train.  I did know how to ride a subway before, but now I know how to get around  by bus waiting as much as 20 minutes for it to show. An odd side effect of being on a bus with strangers who probably don't speak much English is that you stop talking all together.  No one on the buses talks unless it is to quiet their child.  Mostly, they listen to ipods, read, or doze.  But rarely does anyone talk.  Yesterday I was on a bus that was so crowded all the seats and the aisle were elbow to elbow people.  Probably 55 - 60 people were on the bus, and the bus was SILENT.  Between the quiet nature of public transportation and the language barrier, I've found that I no longer say the customary "Hi. How are you?" or   "Excuse me." etc.  No more potential for "small talk" with a stranger, unless that stranger speaks English too.

Recently I realized that this year has allowed me (or forced me) to explore different interests.  For the past few decades my hobbies have focused on singing and acting and walking.  These are three thing that I love!  While in Korea I've not had the opportunity to sing or act BUT I have been able to resurrect old interests like playing volleyball and piano.  About two or three times a month I've been playing duets with a friend from work.  I've also taken up yoga once a week.  There is a pretty large group of teachers who like to play volleyball, so I've been able to do that again (even ended up on this weekend tournaments' winning team!)  I've taken up hiking and more biking.  It's been fun to pursue new interests and resurrect old ones!  I believe I'm becoming more physically diverse.  That's pretty cool.

The last way I believe I've changed is that I've gotten spoiled.  To define that further, my job here has spoiled me, and I love it.  I haven't had to work at a dizzying pace this year nor have I had to work tirelessly at home with a huge paperwork load every night.  This is an amazing thing!  It means I am pretty much stress free and relaxed for a good portion of each day.  This is not to say that I am not working hard or to my fullest potential.  On the contrary, I believe I've got more time for planning, thinking, and creativity.  I have more contact with my students since I have fewer students to care for.  I get to be myself in the classroom and that is a joy.  I believe it would be hard to return to 150 students to care for and 150 papers to mark.  For one who has sought balance for much of her life, I believe I've found the best balance here.  Lots of time with family; lots of time with friends; productive time at work; (more time needed at church, though).

If any of these changes sound intriguing to you, I encourage you to think beyond your usual "world", even if it is just to look at a National Geographic magazine or go for that bike ride you've been talking about but never do.  You're never too old to learn something new.  Give it a go!

Thank you, Asia "Count Down" (5 days until seeing Adam)

Count Down

7 years has passed 

6 pm deadlines for grades to be submitted: MET!

5 more days in Hong Kong

4 more nights of sleeping in a bed before boarding a plane

3 more days before turning in my computer and HKIS ID

2 pets re-homed and settled

1 super blood moon signalling the change

0 regrets

May 26 photo at the conclusion of the lunar eclipse of the super moon.

All photos by © Brenda Brayko.  All rights reserved. 

Thank you, Asia "First Lines" (6 days until seeing Adam)

Between 2010 and 2021 while living in Korea and Hong Kong, I have continued to write.

I have written 239 posts on this blog "Oh, The Places You'll Go", millions of emails - pretty sure - and at least 70 poems.

Here are the FIRST LINES of my poems in no particular order.  Well, actually that's not true.  The order in which they appear is the order in which they occur in my Google Drive.  That is, my poems are ordered by when they were last modified so these lines are ordered thus.  It is more or less a chronological ordering; I think you will recognize that. Enjoy.  

(Remember, this is a poem made of poems!)

First Lines

Here at KIS

Have arrived in Korea.  We are very tired.

First and foremost, I'm looking forward to hugs with family and friends and lots of

There's something about Burger King 

I'm a psychopath.

Since your inception 2 years ago you've had 5,265 visits

Just get something on the page.

Who am I?

When I was six my family lived in the country

When I beheld its yellow eye my heart

The summer I was 15 my whole life was lifted

Surely the current is strong, the water is freezing

haphazard

Today begins the march toward Calvary

A one-inch puffball becomes a mouse

Hidden in the early morning darkness

I used to dream bigger

The change is nearly imperceptible

It goes something like this,

Your Siren song cannot lure me

Twenty-five years together

They look out over the seascape from shore

Rock.

As the heart ever beats

When we left Green Bay we had no idea

A silhouetted shape of His suffering rises starkly

Distant skyscrapers line and stack like legos

A sensitive boy of almost 9

The air is heavy like a wool jacket

The students were carefully prepped

I got plump you got grey

So here we are in this life

The charming girl with the big smile and the non-stop chatter

You're growing me up

I am from the Driftless area of bluffs and streams, fossils and crystals

The day is sunny and hot in the Philippines

I've been wearing 50 for a week now

No one ever told me that learning was the Answer to the question of Life.

Who are you, Kolkata?

The tide is low at Tai Tam Bay

In life your spirit was big and strong and vibrant

You are newly born on the other side of the veil

You breathe in and out.

Your arrival took us by surprise.

An unfoldment of a dance whose only purpose is to dance

I see butterflies every day.

Birds of early morning call urgently across the jungle below.

May you know who you are.

Fight by staying put.

"The sky is falling. The sky is falling."

Rigby and I stand on the 115 year old stone footbridge at Tai Tam

From up here

Fresh, crisp air of a blue sky of lazy, white adrift

Uncertainty

Get up at your leisure.

You cried for nature and the outdoors.

It sucks.

It's lonely in here

Oh, Covid-19 you sneaky shit with an invisibility cloak

You are stepping out there beyond my purview.

Slow down.

Come in!

Dear

God

54 is realizing how old my parents are - I mean, I am now the age they were. . .

As I contemplate Sharon Olds' "Ode to the Tampon"

When I walk through the woods, feel the wonder of it, notice the bees and smell the flowers

You took away my peeps again.

On this day

Find a home for Rigby

Thank you, Asia, for providing the time and inspiration for so much poetry. 

Thank you, Asia "From everywhere" (7 days until seeing Adam)

Photo credit: Kylie U.

Something that I doubt could or would happen to me in Wisconsin in the course of a day.

First, meet an Iranian in a line at a government office and strike up a conversation which ends up being an hour long and highly interesting.

Next, go out with a lovely circle of friends in which there is a Scot, a Brit, a few Aussies, an American (me), a Hong Konger, and a Botswanan.

The world is both bigger and smaller because we chose to explore it.  What a gift it has been to meet, come to know, love and value people of different cultures, backgrounds, beliefs and ethnicities.  

Thank you, Asia.

Thank you, Asia "Food and Friends" (8 days until Green Bay)

 It seems like nearly all of my pictures with friends include one of two things - views from amazing hikes or beautiful dishes of food.  This will mostly be a bit of a tour around Hong Kong's culinary scene.  I am far from a foodie, as I have no vocabulary to talk about food.  But I certainly do enjoy it. 

I have come a long way from first having yogurt at the Luther College cafeteria, thereby expanding my Midwestern palate.

I would have to say that my present top ethnic food choices are Thai food and Indian food.  I don't believe you will see any pictures of Indian food, (perhaps because it doesn't look that appetizing in pictures.)  Pictures that follow have been taken within the last two years in Hong Kong and are representative of many amazing meals with cherished people.

On Lamma Island Brent and I hiked and then had a set lunch at a seafood restaurant.  This is their calamari.

This is the sticky rice at Ruam, a Thai restaurant in Wan Chai that Brent and I enjoyed when only two were allowed at a table due to Covid restrictions.

One of Adam's favorite restaurants was Veggie SF.  I returned there alone this year, missing my son.  This is the vegan  dish "Trip to Bali," Indonesian Gado Gado salad with coconut rice and tofu.

One of the fun things to do is make and assemble Vietnamese fresh spring rolls at home.  Don't forget the sweet chilli sauce or peanut sauce.

While we couldn't get to Macau for the amazing Portuguese egg tarts there, I did manage to get one in Hong Kong.  Best when fresh and warm with a light, puffy pastry.

A restaurant I was just introduced to this year was Artemis and Apollo, an upscale Greek restaurant in Wan Chai.  Here the Wombies were gathering to wish Kelly well before her maternity leave. She is now mother of TWO boys.

More recently I returned to Artemis and Apollo with my good friend Michelle so that we could say our final goodbyes and enjoy the best lamb chop ever!

One of the kinds of restaurants our family first discovered while living in Seoul is called a shabu shabu style restaurant.  With a burner on your table and broth brought to you, you can get all the veg and meat you want, and then create your soup right there. Not long ago, we finally ate at a shabu shabu in HK.

I couldn't leave Hong Kong without finding some Peking duck.  Here we were at an upscale restaurant in Soho called The Monogomous Chinese with our good friends the Forresters enjoying their duck.  

Around Brent's birthday we headed to a Japanese teppanyaki restaurant called Nadaman in Admiralty with our good friends the Morris's.  Alec and Robbie have been friends since fifth grade. 

sashimi

Robbie, Alec, Bruce, Brent, Brenda (Michelle taking the picture) 

as our meal is prepared on the grill by the chef.

Not long ago we headed to a German restaurant in Kowloon called Biergarten Fass with our friends the Shirley and Ian.  Brent finally got some rösti potatoes after many years away from Monroe, Wisconsin.  The beer was good, too.  Oh, and we were sitting inside a beer barrel!

One of Brent's favorite places to go for Vietnamese pho is in Central to Nha Trang.  I love it too but prefer the chicken version rather than the beef.  

And, then there's the Korean BBQ that we missed have so much that we ended up going two weekends in a row.  First with the Lovelins - Dave is the HS principal and Theresa is a good friend and school nurse. . . Here we are with all the side dishes. 

and the meat on the grill. . .

and the kimchi.

We returned the next weekend with Don and Kathryn Drake - Don is the Associate Head of School at HKIS and had been my principal at KIS.  I taught two of their four children and took a third to India on Interim.  Our families have known one another for nine years!

Of course not every amazing meal must be found in a restaurant.  Mhel our domestic helper has been cooking us amazing meals all year long, including salmon about once a week.

Upon returning to Hong Kong last summer after dropping Adam off in Wisconsin, we were home-quarantined for two weeks.  What a blessing to have a meal dropped off at our door by our friends Gayle and John.  (Who recently dropped off a loaf of bread in our final days in HK.  Thank you!)  

We shall cherish our memories of Hong Kong and all of the variety of cuisine available here.  But mostly, we shall cherish all of the laughter, sharing, and moments with one another and with friends while at some of our favorite restaurants.  

First photo credit to Russell R.

All other photos by © Brenda Brayko. All rights reserved.

Thank you, Asia "We will be in good hands" (9 days until Green Bay)

Yesterday I said good-bye to my two classes of seniors.  The Class of 2021 has had to be far more resilient that classes in recent history.  (A pandemic will do that.)  We concluded the year together with a bit of sharing.  The question was: If you were to give the graduation speech, what would be your central message?  (My apologies that what follows is only paraphrase as their words were far more eloquent.)

• Failure is a part of life; that's okay.
• Look within for who you are.
• Find your true self within, not outside of yourself - from culture or society or who your family expects you to be.
• Connection to one another is what matters.
• Let your path unfold.  
• You are worthy.
• Sometimes when you think it went wrong, it actually went right.
• It's all about unconditional love.
• Life is about living experiences - not working to get good grades and getting into universities.
• Let go of thinking you must always have control.
• Change happens, and that is as it should be.

Perhaps you can see and feel, as I do, the collective wisdom of these young adults.  It is heartening to me to know that as my generation relinquishes leadership and power to the next generations, these young people are among those preparing to step up.  

It has been a great pleasure and honor to teach these and many other young people over my eleven years in Korea and Hong Kong.  

Thank you, Asia "Alec's Choral Music Journey" (10 days until Green Bay)

Alec has been a singer since grade school.  When we lived in Korea, he joined the after school choir with Ms. Roskens.  She was an amazing director who made music fun while putting on a high quality concert in which the students followed hand signals to know precisely when to stand, sit, or move on and off the stage.  One year they needed an accompanist, so Alec told her I played piano.  The next thing I knew I was practicing piano music again and playing for their rehearsals!  Ah, good times!

Upon moving to Hong Kong (Alec was now in 5th grade), all of the students had music class.  His new director, also chose amazing meaningful and fun music for the kids to perform.  

By middle school, Alec was truly in love with singing.  He was getting really good at it, too.  Ms. Bechdolt taught the students how to beatbox and move their bodies, smile, and sing in several languages.  Alec and three girls formed a quartet and tried out for a spotlight in one of the concerts.  They sang a Pentatonix Christmas song and, at the last minute, included the complicated clapping patterns.  Excellent!  

As an eighth grader under Ms. Meininger's direction, his quartet sang "You Will Be Found" and literally brought tears to my eyes with their tight harmonies and sappy lyrics.  At the same concert, Alec was one of three boys who sang the solo parts for "My Shot" from Hamilton. (Click here to view.) I was incredibly proud of his courage and execution.  That year, too, he attended AMIS music festival in Thailand, where he sang with middle school students from all over Asia. 

In high school, Alec began as a freshman in the Men's Choir where, under Mr. Udall's direction, they were the choir with the reputation for the most fun, show-stopping songs like "Johnny Schmoker".  They both would execute well and demonstrate showmanship as they stood in a semi-circle downstage rather than use the risers.  

Alec's sophomore year he made the auditioned Madrigal Singers, HKIS's top choir.  They had been invited to sing at Carnegie Hall in March! Unfortunately, a schedule change made it impossible for Alec to join.  This, of course, was a grave disappointment for him - and his parents - as he would miss out both on the experience of the top choir AND a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to sing at Carnegie Hall.  It turned out Mr. Udall STILL wanted and needed him.  So, while he continued singing with the Men's Choir a second year, he also prepared on his own to sing at Carnegie Hall. 

Well, you may recall this thing happened right about March 2020. . . Covid-19 shut down EVERYTHING, including Carnegie Hall.  And so a different life experience unfolded - learning to live with disappointment. 

This year, Alec's junior year, he made it into Madrigal Singers!  Ms. Hausman took over the program.  They had a rocky start to the year due to Covid-19 and spent the first seven weeks on Zoom.  But eventually, everyone was together again and able to practice properly (behind masks, of course).  Again, he found himself as a soloist for the choral version of "You Will Be Found."

Last night was the final choir concert of the year at HKIS.  I was truly blown away by the quality of the program which included a cappella music, music accompanied by a string quartet, and lyrics in at least three languages (English, Latin, Afrikaans). Again, I was terribly proud of Alec who had a substantial solo in "Tshotsholoza".   Ms. Hausman resurrected a choral tradition that had been interrupted by Covid, the closing of the final concert with "The Irish Blessing".   Not a time passes that Brent and I don't tear up with that one.

Through all the years, you may be surprised to know that the students always have the music memorized.  I know that through my high school and college years, I always had a music folder in hand.  Not these kids!  

What a true blessing to witness Alec's opportunities and growth these past nine years in the choral programs at KIS and HKIS.  Thank you!

Thank you, Asia "The sound of HK" (11 days until Green Bay)

I remember rather distinctly the first time Brent and I visited Hong Kong, especially the city itself.  We wandered about looking at all the signs - mixtures of English and Chinese.  We noticed the multitude of people walking and even the presence of some working laborers with no shirts (this would simply not happen in Korea).  But mostly, I remember the sound of Hong Kong.  

The traffic signals here have a distinct sound which indicates to anyone blind just when it is okay to cross the street and when time is running out.  It is a beeping sound that, should I ever hear it again, will immediately propel be back to life in Hong Kong.

Thankfully, you don't hear much honking or many police or ambulance sirens here.  You might hear the sound of the ding dings (double decker trams) on the tracks or general traffic or buses shifting gears, though. And you will certainly hear people speaking in a variety of languages - mostly Cantonese, English, Chinese or French.

If you use the MTR (subway system) you will be well taken care of by the disembodied voices constantly providing guidance and rules while you are there.  Presently you first hear Cantonese and then Mandarin and then English.  It is quite lovely to hear three different languages, especially when one is your own!  But interestingly, the ORDER in which these are given has changed over time.  When Hong Kong was under British rule, English was the first you would hear (I am told).  Now it is the last.  My favorite recording has been "When using escalators, don't only look at your mobile phone."  Here is a sample: 

Certainly the sounds in Green Bay will be rather different from the sounds in Hong Kong.  I wonder how long these will linger in my mind.

(Bonus video of crossing sound follows.  Enjoy the "stop" sound.)

All photos and videos by © Brenda Brayko.  All rights reserved. 

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Thank you, Asia "The Final Farewell to Jigs Chuseok Brayko" (12 days until Green Bay)

 

Today was the day we re-homed Jigs with a lovely family with two young children.  He will be well cared for; I have no doubt.  And so in his lifetime he will have three families to which he brings joy.  Sort of like every pet adventure story out there: pet finds love, has to move on, finds a new home and love again, has to move on, finds a new home and love again.

Brent and I had never been cat people, nor had we ever had a cat before Jigs.  For about 9 years, he taught us the joys of being a cat owner.  He is a cat-dog or dog-cat or some such.  He can wait by the door for you at the end of the day. Meow to wake you in the morning.  Snuggle all night long in bed (as he did last night - what a gift).  He can fit into cubbies and boxes and bags.  He can speak "cat" really well!  (I can speak "cat" too, but I never quite know what I am saying.)  He can play with feathers and lasers and strings.  He can lick your nose or fingers or toes.  He can somehow magically appear on the top of the kitchen cupboards where you need a ladder to get him down. He loves and loves with his presence and his purring.  

This morning he seemed to want to go out to the hall entry.  When I let him out, he sat down and simply stared at our front door for a long time (see video at the end of this blog).  Eventually he moved farther away from the door and closer to the elevator, still staring at our door, but apparently positioning himself to leave.  I think he KNEW.  And I think he was ready.

We were ready too.  

Once at his new home, he left the crate immediately and began checking out the place, smelling with his mouth open (something I learned about today), and generally being curious.  By evening my friend reported he had napped and eaten and was being playful.  I think the transition will be just fine. 

He will be sorely missed and ever loved.  Thank you, Asia, for bringing us Jigs and turning us into "cat people". 

Thank you, Asia "An open letter to HKIS" (13 days until Green Bay)

 Dear HKIS,

We have had seven amazing and eventful years together.  You were my employer, my foundation for friendships, and the school for my children from fifth grade through twelfth grade.  

As my employer you stretched me to teach subjects that were virtually unfamiliar to me (Humanities II and French 1).  And you allowed me to teach subjects I love (Junior English and AP Literature). You asked me to coach and shepherd students in the Drama Club and Forensics Speaking club.  We travelled all over Asia Pacific with some incredible success.  With your facilities and support for creative curriculum, my own students enjoyed all sorts of experiences in and out of the classroom.

The many administrators over these years - Patrick, Brent, Lauren, Sue, David, Carrie, Linda, Don and Ron - supported me professionally.  Sometimes it was performance assessment and reviews which were somehow never as intimidating as at other schools; sometimes it was by making the faculty a pancake breakfast. The fact that your leadership cared about me as both employee and human being mattered. 

My colleagues became friends (and in some cases friends became colleagues)!  We celebrated Christmas together singing carols at the main gate.  We watched in awe as school spirit manifested in games and class videos and lipsyncs.  When Covid-19 forces us to shut down the campus and go virtual, your capable leadership teams found ways to keeping us moving forward online while still caring for our well-being.

My children experienced everything from learning opportunities in the classroom to PEAK and Interim trips as well as Self-motivated learning projects in Middle School and, for Alec - choir.  I watched gratefully as the school supported Adam coming out as transgender at his eighth grade graduation - the name being printed in the program as Adam for the first time.  And when Alec sang solo bits including "My Shot" from Hamilton, I couldn't have been more proud.  In the care of colleagues and friends, my own children were supported through thick and thin.

And the students themselves have also been a great support and joy to work with.  I have loved coming to school each day and class each day where I can be myself and teach subjects I love with students who are open and polite and engaged. You have been willing to do some silly things along the way. One of my favorite events of each year has been the National Honour Society students putting on a Thanksgiving Dinner with food and entertainment for faculty.  What an affirmation we receive from personal notes to videos.  Such expression of gratitude fuels me for months afterward. 

While certainly there have been more ups than downs, the very elements themselves have challenged you. Your campus itself suffered damage at the hands of Typhoon Mankhut.  Incredibly, you rebuilt back better.  And the building improvements, changes, and even new building projects at the other divisions were absolutely jaw-dropping. (I can't wait to see the high school campus  5 -7 years from now when the current plans have been executed).

And so, as we hit just over a week of school left, I give my deepest gratitude to you, HKIS.  You have supported me in every way imaginable.  

Thank you.  Merci.  唔該

Brenda Brayko

Carolling at the gate for students as they enter. 

Social at the Braykos - Janet and Chris win the drink mixing competition

Brent (Assoc. Principal) and Patrick (Principal 2014-17)

HS Christmas party at Sugar, a rooftop bar in HK.

2014 photo of the women in the Humanities Department (AKA Wombies)

Seniors show what school spirit looks like

Adam's 8th grade graduation attire, first official day as Adam

Alec's eighth grade graduation day (hint of blue in his hair)

Drama Club ready for APAC

Forensics competitors at ISKL

Brent (and all HS administrators) making pancakes for the staff

Typhoon damage

AP Literature students re-enacting Hamlet

Adam nostalgically overlooking the middle school campus before graduating in 2020

All photos by © Brenda Brayko.  All rights reserved.